Fathers, dads, daddies, and others

I am missing my kids today, but they will be back here tomorrow. They are with their dad and I hope they are having a good time. Kids should be with their dads on Father's Day. At least unless there is a darn good reason.

All of this has got me thinking about dads. My own, the men I know, all of their stories. What an important job it is to be a dad and how so many men may never understand the impact they can have on a child's life. And how many others so desperately want to be a part of their child's life, only to be denied that opportunity by a vindictive ex. It's all pretty damn sad.

To my own dad...I wish you could have been the dad I dreamed of having. The one who valued his children and wanted to be a part of their lives. Who would have protected us from the abuse at our step-mother's hands, instead of looking away. Even today, as much as I hate to admit it, there is part of me that still wishes we could be in contact. But I know the reality of the situation. You and the step-mom are a package deal. So I will have to bow out. I will never subject myself and my kids to her again. I still miss you, on some level. But it's taken years for me to heal from all of the damage.

To my grandpa...I still miss you so, so very much. You were such a wonderful man and I am so thankful that you stepped in when my dad wasn't able to do what a dad should do. It's been 16 and a half years since you passed, but you will never be forgetten for all of the love and kindness you brought to my life. I will always love you.

To Ed...What a strange situation. You dated my mom for quite some time, were there through all of the hard teenage stuff, and never had any kids of your own. Even after you and mom were no longer dating, you remained such a constant in the lives of me and my sister. You are a wonderful example of what a real man is and I am so glad to have you in my life and very proud that my kids call you "Grandpa Ed". You earned that title fair and square. I may not say it enough, but I love you, too.

To my kids' dad...I am glad that they are with you on this day. I hope that you can realize what wonderful boys they are and treat them with love and kindness.

To my guy...Every kid should be so lucky as to have a daddy like you. You do such a wonderful job with your kids. Not just the normal dad stuff, but so much of the day to day parenting that often falls to the mom. I love hearing you intereact with them, with such obvious love and patience. You are such a lovely combination of nurturer, fun guy, and gentle disciplanarian. I also appreciate how you also treat my kids with such kindess and respect. It is very much appreciated. I love you, too, honey!

To my friend, Billy...My heart absolutely breaks for you on this day. What your ex has done is beyond cruel. I wish so much that one day your son will realize how much you wanted to spend time with him, to be in his life. Parental Alienation is inhumane. Not only are you hurt, so is your child, even if he doesn't realize it yet. You are a good man and I hope so much that one day you will be reunited with your son. (((Billy)))

Happy Father's Day to all of you who have been such glowing examples of fatherhood, even through adversity. And, what the Hell....Happy Father's Day to you, too, dad, where ever you may be.